My 300-Year-Old Friend: The Greenland Shark

 Hello, my name is Umka. I am a polar bear from Greenland, and today I want to tell you about one of the strangest friends in the Arctic Ocean — the legendary Greenland shark.

You see, life in Greenland can be very quiet. Ice moves slowly, snow falls slowly, and apparently some sharks also move very slowly. My friend — the greenland shark — swims so calmly that sometimes I think he is just floating and thinking about ancient history.

The most amazing thing about the Greenland shark is its age. Scientists say these sharks can live around 300 years, which means my friend might actually remember the world before many modern countries even existed. Sometimes when we talk, I joke that he probably remembers a time when there was no internet, no smartphones, and definitely no discussions about Trump Greenland.

The greenland shark is not a very glamorous creature compared to tropical sharks. It has a long, dark gray body, small eyes, and a slow, relaxed swimming style. These sharks live deep in the cold waters around Greenland and the North Atlantic. They can grow up to 6–7 meters long, making them one of the largest sharks in the world. Despite their size, they move slowly and quietly through icy waters, sometimes deeper than 2,000 meters.

One interesting thing about them is that their flesh is naturally toxic when fresh. Humans actually have to ferment the meat for a long time before eating it — which, if you ask me, sounds like a lot of work just to eat a shark.

When I sit on my iceberg and talk with my old shark friend, he sometimes tells me stories about the past. According to him, the ocean was quieter long ago. No ships, no engines, and definitely no arguments about whether someone should buy Greenland.

So whenever humans argue again about Trump Greenland, I just smile and think about my ancient shark friend who has already seen three centuries of history. For him, human politics probably feels like a very short conversation.

Anyway, that is the story of my old Arctic friend — the greenland shark, the slowest historian of the ocean.

This article is brought to you by the sponsor of our Arctic column — the online casino WildTornado.